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Aiming At The Stars

by John Greska

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1.
Run 02:58
Run, child Grab your heart before it’s defiled And your memories go and run wild And your mind is lost at sea Run, fast Hold your breath and let the sun past There’s a chance you won’t end up last (Ten, nine, eight) If you run as fast as me (seven, six, five, four, three, two, one) Run, away That’s what they say you do anyway You were never made to settle down and stay So just let yourself be free Run, now To the finish line and take a bow The only ending that you will allow The one you’ll never see
2.
It’s just one of those days You gotta get up for work You really hate your job And your boss is a jerk You get in line for a coffee In your wallet there’s a five and a dime But you’re saving up to fly to Hawaii You wonder when you’ll ever get the time But the sun’s still shining Your smile is beaming And as you’re driving Your heart is dreaming About the day that You get up and fly awaaay Monday it’s just one of those days and Tuesday it’s just one of those days and Wednesday it’s just one of those days and Thursday it’s just one of those days Don’t you ever get so bored Everything’s a chore And you’re peeking behind closed doors Well, no I don’t I’ve still got so many places to go. Friday is the last of those days and Saturday is your favorite day and Sunday we all go and pray and say God can’t we have one more day? The world will leave you behind If you say in your mind Each day’s just a waste of time You gotta write your own way Today’s more than just one of those days You got lots of dreams But no time for sleep Breaking all your seams And the repair’s not cheap The day is over as it started With a little hesitation in your mind About the pleasant little past that you departed For the future that is leaving you behind But the sun’s still shining Your smile is beaming And as you’re driving Your heart is dreaming About the day that You get up and fly awaaay Monday it’s just one of those days and Tuesday it’s just one of those days and Wednesday it’s just one of those days and Thursday it’s just one of those days Don’t you ever get so bored Everything’s a chore And you’re peeking behind closed doors Well, no I don’t I’ve still got so many places to go. Friday is the last of those days and Saturday is your favorite day and Sunday we all go and pray and say God can’t we have one more day? The world will leave you behind If you say in your mind Each day’s just a waste of time You gotta write your own way Today’s more than just one of those days It’s just one of those days Everything goes wrong You don’t know if you should cry or scream or breathe So you put it in a song You don’t know why you do it Cause you don’t let ‘em listen anyway But it helps just a little getting through it Helps make it more than one of those days More than one of those days More than one of those Monday it’s just one of those days and Tuesday it’s just one of those days and Wednesday it’s just one of those days and Thursday it’s just one of those days Don’t you ever get so bored Everything’s a chore And you’re peeking behind closed doors Well, no I don’t I’ve still got so many places to go. Friday is the last of those days and Saturday is your favorite day and Sunday we all go and pray and say God can’t we have one more day? The world will leave you behind If you say in your mind Each day’s just a waste of time You gotta write your own way Today’s more than just one of those days
3.
So I was walking to the corner store Didn’t want to get anything Just wanted to clear my head Just wanted to get out of bed But I Passed a younger student on their first day of class They looked so hopeful and loving and full of life They reminded me a lot of us I couldn’t help but laugh You probably don’t remember what you did to Earn your place in the seventh circle of hell of my mind, well Good for you, Forgetting must be kind, But It’s here to stay with me, Like a nightmare that I’ll never wake from Like a breakup song there’s no escape song I am drowning Hold me close Hold me tight Block them all out and tell me it’s all right Love me the most All through the night Together, forever-- Yeeah, that’s what I’d say if I Missed you Yeah if I missed you But it’s not an issue Don’t get me a tissue There’s no tears to dry No I don’t miss you You are just pissed I asked you to leave Don’t call me naive Cause I didn’t grieve over you It’s not my fault I don’t miss You I was hoping just as much as you That our story would go differently That our love would be eternity That I wouldn’t lose my sanity But I Placed too much face in the idea that You were right about everybody hating me that You could handle something just slightly more complicated Than walking and talking at the same time Or breathing You probably never noticed all the times that I laid down And cried and cried and cried cause you just Prided yourself on keeping my tongue tied While I would bide my time Well I collected all those tears And I put them in a jar the size of the ocean And I taught myself how to swim Cause I was drowning Hold me close Hold me tight Block them all out and tell me it’s all right Love me the most All through the night Together, forever-- Yeeah, that’s what I’d say if I Missed you Yeah if I missed you But it’s not an issue Don’t get me a tissue There’s no tears to dry No I don’t miss you (Hold me close Hold me tight) You are just pissed I asked you to leave (Block them all out and tell me it’s all right) Don’t call me naive Cause I didn’t grieve over you Love me the most All through the night It’s not my fault I don’t miss Together, forever) You Yeeah, that’s what I’d say if I Missed you Yeah if I missed you But it’s not an issue Don’t get me a tissue There’s no tears to dry No I don’t miss you (Hold me close Hold me tight) You are just pissed I asked you to leave (Block them all out and tell me it’s all right) Don’t call me naive Cause I didn’t grieve over you Love me the most All through the night It’s not my fault I don’t miss Together, forever) You
4.
Suicide Pact 04:04
Wake up (Goddamn) Tell me where I gotta go Tell me what I gotta drink and gotta think and gotta know If my chip falls off just put it back on My shoulder is small but my arms are strong I’ll breathe sixteenths and honk to the rhythm And when my neighbor yells, I’ll yell back with him Tell me if it’s safe to cross the street and when to find new music or to put it on repeat You see I Have no opinions or thoughts hereby I’m a Happy middle ground just trying every moment not to Get tangled up in a murderous apocalypse the Prophet’s apocryphal bucket list, Beelz’ accomplices But I’m not here for a zombie revolution or Nuclear war or mother nature’s human absolution Nah Hard choices, hard knocks Throwing hard rocks If it happens, just pull the plug and let it go [beep] Instrumental I-I’ve, got a little bit of life left, Seven by three down, two score to see, if I-I get a little ambitious, I might bump it up to three But all this Ti-ime is getting in the way of Finding my fate with my fadin’ fantasy Ooh Mama said clean up your act now, Run from the suicide pact Wake up (Again?) Tell me something that’ll sting Yeah my skin is made of felt, and my muscle’s made of string If I talk too fast then the words won’t match With the others that were ordered from the 22nd batch My limbs are very bendy And I’m advertiser friendly And I’m trying so intently Just to keep you needing plenty Of my trendy little frenzy That my plushy body feeds To the diligent assembly That is constantly in need I’ll keep walking till it’s time for me to run Tell me if you’re having fun or getting too close to the sun My wings won’t melt when I’m flying towards you Cause my stitchin’s really tight and I got lots of glue Cause I’m not here for a zombie revolution or Nuclear war or mother nature’s human absolution Nah Hard choices, hard knocks Throwing hard rocks If it happens, just pull the plug and let it go [beep] I-I’ve, got a little bit of life left, Seven by three down, two score to see, if I-I get a little ambitious, I might bump it up to three But all this Ti-ime is getting in the way of (Ti-ime is fading) Finding my fate with my fadin’ fantasy (Close and fading) Ooh Mama said clean up your act now, (Mama said clean up) Run from the suicide pact [ (Drink the Kool-Aid) (Time to get played) (Chuck the rules you made out the window) (Don’t be dismayed) (Everyone stayed) (Fuck it up and let the bodies hit the floor) ]x4 Maybe the point is that there is no middle ground No way to get around our little hell safe and sound We’re all tangled up in a murderous apocalypse The prophet’s apocryphal bucket list, Beelz’ accomplices So if we’re stuck in a zombie revolution or Nuclear war or mother nature’s human absolution And surviving is the only thing that we can do Let’s survive then, me and you. Instrumental I-I’ve, got a little bit of life left, Seven by three-- *cough, cough* Sorry, sorry I-I’ve, got a little bit of life left, Seven by three down, two score to see, if I-I get a little ambitious, I might bump it up to three But all this Ti-ime is getting in the way of (Ti-ime is fading) Finding my fate with my fadin’ fantasy (Close and fading) Ooh Mama said clean up your act now, (Mama said clean up) Run from the suicide pact
5.
Look at me Look at everything I could be Look at all the plans I’ve made And the hands I’ve played Now my tickets paid, I’mma get out of here They’ve got time There’s no point wasting mine I’ve been working so damn hard Gonna fly so far Aiming at the stars and I’m out of here But what of all the love I leave behind And what could have been Two roads diverged but there’s just one of me Where do I even begin Who do I love When the birds stop flying up above And the sun stops rising in the east Productivity has ceased But that doesn’t in the least Stop me asking the question Who do I love When the clouds stop rolling through the sky And the wolves stop howling at the moon Need to figure out my tune And I gotta do it soon So keep asking the question Who do I love Look at them Look at all the life they’ve lent Look at the love they gave me The scars they saved And I have the nerve to get out of here I could stay This was my life anyway And it was through help with them And so in the end It won’t matter if I got out of here But what of all the hope I leave behind And what could have been Two roads diverged but there’s just one of me How could I possibly choose then Who do I love When the birds stop flying up above And the sun stops rising in the east Productivity has ceased But that doesn’t in the least Stop me asking the question Who do I love When the clouds stop rolling through the sky And the wolves stop howling at the moon Need to figure out my tune And I gotta do it soon So keep asking the question Who do I love They ask you What you wanna be when you grow up but never tell you that the question and the answer To the game are rigged They mean well but I can tell you if I wanna win the prize Then I gotta keep my eyes on it So I put Love into music and to movies and the little things that Can’t get angry with me when I take it back Everyone supports your dreams but there’s a guilt you feel cause You know you won’t always be around to have their back They say that love is unconditional the thought is unoriginal but everyone I care for Seems to follow that additionally They have put the effort into climbing all my walls without complaints and helping me go through it all So in the End am I just meant to stay and show all my appreciation or do I bounce off of it and use it to break free and do I build a better future try to make them proud of me or take a breather just do neither cause I can’t choose Who do I love When the birds stop flying up above And the sun stops rising in the east Productivity has ceased But that doesn’t in the least Stop me asking the question Who do I love When the clouds stop rolling through the sky And the wolves stop howling at the moon Need to figure out my tune And I gotta do it soon So keep asking the question Who do I love

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released April 9, 2020

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John Greska Chicago, Illinois

"Every flower, every grain of sand, is reaching out to shake my hand." - Spongebob

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